Show About an Awkward Guy and a Girl Is Telling Him I Love You Over and Over Again

 Written past Writer's Corps member Emily Desanctis

Disappointing someone is tough. Most of united states of america will practice somersaults to avoid the uncomfortable interaction of telling someone the contrary of what they want to hear, particularly when it involves romantic feelings.

When yous really care about someone, it's also equally hard to be on the receiving end of "I'm not looking for a human relationship right now." Keeping the following tips in mind will help you evangelize the news in a mode that'southward as healthy and painless as possible, for everyone involved.

Define the dynamic upfront

The all-time way to approach this topic is early on. Whether yous're looking for something casual and desire to keep it that way, or whether you're not interested in anything at all, clarifying this from the beginning helps avoid defoliation and awkward conversations afterward.

Sure, over time your feelings may modify—and so might this other person'south—but starting out the discussion from an honest place grounded by how you feel in the present is a must.

RELATED: How To Bounce Back From A Breakup

Limited The Situation In Terms Of Your Feelings And Needs

Forget personal insults, apologies, or blame; instead be honest and direct with how yous feel, what yous demand, and how that isn't aligned with being in a relationship. For instance, maybe you're feeling overwhelmed with classes and yous need to focus on your schoolwork; or perchance y'all're feeling excited and curious nearly being newly unmarried and you need some time to explore and figure out what you really want without making whatsoever commitments.

Whatever the state of affairs, focusing on feelings and needs will help prevent it from escalating into an statement. It may exist that this other person's feelings and needs are in direct opposition to yours, and that'southward perfectly okay. As long as they're stating these in a non-accusatory mode that doesn't minimize your needs, hear them out while staying truthful to what's right for you.

RELATED: v Questions to Inquire Yourself Before You Appointment a Friend's Ex

Explain Your Perspective—To A Point

Choosing not to exist in a human relationship is a personal option—a freedom that you shouldn't take to defend or over-explain. Yous could leave it at that or y'all could go into more detail, helping the other person understand your perspective.

In some cases, taking time to explain how yous feel can aid them better accept your decision and move on. It can also communicate a degree of respect and intendance for their feelings. However, talking through your perspective is only helpful to a point—every bit long as you're comfy and the conversation is healthy. If information technology shifts into unhealthy territory where the other person is trying to modify your mind or make you feel bad, for example blaming or guilting you for your decision, cease the conversation.

Exist Kind And Unapologetic

Deciding you don't want to be in a relationship—whether with a specific person or in general—doesn't mean you have to turn into a cold, unfeeling person when yous limited how you experience.  Role of being mature is having conversations you lot don't want to have in a way that respects yourself and the other person involved.

If the other person tells you lot in a healthy way that they're bummed at your 'no', y'all could express agreement for their reaction and regret at their injure feelings. Just be careful to depict the line at taking the blame; for example, if they say "I tin can't believe you would do this to me. You knew how much it would hurt me, and y'all did information technology anyway" or something to this effect that blames you lot for not getting what they desire. Your needs are always valid and taking intendance of yourself is something you should never have to repent for or be fabricated to feel bad nearly.

RELATED: How to Meet New People (Even When it's Scary AF)

We're all used to movies showing us that 'no' is simply an opening for an unwanted even so persistent suitor to make their case and change your mind. Even though it's portrayed as middle-thumpingly romantic, this behavior really signals that someone doesn't respect your boundaries, and therefore is non something you lot desire to encourage or accept if you want to accept a healthy relationship.

RELATED: 4 On-screen Romances that Portray Intensity as Love

Maybe you will eventually want a human relationship with this person, and you'll end up together. Or maybe yous'll realize it also late subsequently they've already moved on with someone else. Or maybe you won't e'er give them a second thought. You can't predict what yous're going to want in the futurity and with whom. All you have to go on is how you feel and what you demand today. If you lot focus on doing what's right for you at this moment, your decision—and how to express information technology—will reveal itself clearly.

Learn more than tips on how to let someone down piece of cake or other good for you human relationship communication on the I Love web log.

donnersearturefor.blogspot.com

Source: https://www.joinonelove.org/learn/how-to-tell-someone-youre-not-looking-for-a-relationship/

Share this post